04 February 2013

Thanks, I'll Do It Myself.

Dear Salesman,

I know you were incredulous today when I told you I did not want my carpets cleaned for free.  Your offer seems grand and magnanimous, but what it really boils down to is you, hoping I will see the wonderful amazing job your cleaner does so that I will hire you here on out forever and ever.  I won't.  I'm too cheap for that.  Also, I have access to a carpet cleaner.

On my side it means that you offer to give me an afternoon that was inconvenient to schedule with some stranger in my home cleaning carpets that are of poor quality and will only ever really look nice when replaced.  It's an afternoon of me walking around awkwardly not being able to quite get things done the way I want because there is someone I don't know in my house,  and feeling weird about hovering, but making sure you aren't messing up my stuff and wondering if I cleaned the bathroom adequately. 

You save me no time, because I cannot be out doing other things while you are here. You give me no awesome deal because when I want my carpets clean I do it myself at my leisure.  You give me no peace of mind because I am an introvert who does not like people in her home, so it's more like slow torture.  

Sorry.  No thank you.  It just wasn't meant to work out.  No really.  Yes, I mean it.  Here, just let me shut the door.  Good bye.

Sincerely,  me.

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